Usually, wide open spaces are filled with things other than chairs and tables.  There are times when it is filled with artwork, a statue or sculpture of some sort.  Something that people can look at and talk about on their way somewhere else.

Recently, I thought I was just filling a gap, covering a void that would help stop people making a conclusion on something and on someone.  I was wrong.  I was never needed based on the message I have received today.  I felt betrayed by the fact that I could have done other better things on those days and enjoyed myself immensely.  Instead, I had to plaster a smile and go on as if nothing happened.  I wish that I felt jealous instead; not anger.  Jealousy first hit my mind but then, anger surfaced, asking myself - how could I have been so stupid!  I understand I am not blind or in most cases, pretend to be blind but stupid? Phbffft!  And this is what I want to do right now (me=mandy):

Was it a waste of time?  Somehow I think so.  I used to think that it was my favorite waste of time rather than being on the phone for hours and hours.  But that to me was a complete waste of time and effort.  I know I could have written about how my weekend went and what I have done during the two-day  break from work - about my stroll along Bonifacio High Street and on having hot cocoa at Gloria Jeans on a lazy Sunday afternoon.  But no; we're here now and talking about something else.  I could have gone on and on about Coffee Prince instead.  I think I just heard my brittle heart crack at the edges...

With that thought, I just remembered my favorite song from that Korean TV Series and wanted to share this video with you.  It begins with the girl getting a bunch of one of my favorite flowers, the Carnation...

I'm still upset, mind you.